Over the Edge

You're in the front seat of a roller coaster car, waiting impatiently for it to load with passengers. Your heart beats wildly and your pupils are dilated - your sympathetic nervous system is pushing its boundaries. Even though the car is not yet moving, excitement rushes through your body. After all, you love roller coasters. Right?

The car shudders to life and turns onto the conveyor that will pull it up the first hill. There's no turning back now. You're committed, whether you like it or not. As the mechanical chain pulls you and the other passengers up, you can't help but think, "What have I gotten myself into?" As you get to the top, you peer over the edge. The view from the top doesn't quite mentally prepare you for the thrills, screams, and fear that lie ahead. But, as you know, you are going over. Hang on tight, and try to enjoy the ride.

After a few years of a chemistry and biology degree, I had a change of heart and decided to give mathematics a try. So I signed up for four university mathematics courses, three of which are upper level courses. This morning, as I headed to my course on Problem Solving, I had that gut-dropping feeling that I get on the way up the highest roller coaster hill: I want to get out now, please. Why would I sign up for this? What was I thinking?

During the first few minutes of class, the teacher said exactly what I was feeling. He told us that if we didn't try then we couldn't fail. For many students the prospect of failing is more frightening than the prospect of giving up. If you give up, you will never know if you have the ability to accomplish something. But if you fail, you know that you can't do it. End of story.

Then we started with the problems. My heart beat loudly and strongly and I began to sweat. I felt like a teenager trying to impress someone of the opposite sex who was, quite frankly, out of my league. Instead of getting discouraged, I loved every minute of it! I sat and puzzled and puzzled and puzzled... and didn't come up with a single solution (yet.) But even though I couldn't get to the solution, my euphoria verified to me that I belonged in this math class. I had the adrenaline rush of the nerd world.

I don't know how many hills and valleys make up this roller coaster, but I'm holding on tight for now. And here we go, over the edge.